As I pose this question to myself my mind quiets
and I tune into the depth of my being
I feel myself connect with the primordial feminine energy within me….
a deep powerful, responsive energy that rests at the core of my being,
whose force I feel connecting me to the earth….
Then…rippling upwards through my body as I meditate on it, and an image, not unlike the Venus of Willendorf,
arises in my mind’s eye and I feel the words…
“I am of the earth,
connected with the earth,
nourished by the earth.
I shall return to the earth.
I am the earth.”
Images and felt experiences of my pregnancies ripple through my mind-body and memories of how, in labour and giving birth, that feminine energy empowered me by creating a sense of connection to women everywhere and through all time, who had laboured and given birth in service to creation and I rejoiced to be a woman – to become a mother – to have the experience of giving birth and accepted the role of mother and nurturer with great peace and joy in my heart…..and so at peace for the moment, I return to myself and ask again…
What is it to be a woman today?
This time, the response is different.
I feel a strong downward pull in my body –
a current flowing as of water moving and I receive a vision of a web of flowing water…
streams connecting to lakes and lakes connecting through rivers to oceans…
and I realize…through the water that we are, that we carry, that carries us, that gives us life, that we are one….and I feel my body surrender and I feel the words….
“Open to the flow.
Resist not.
Let yourself be.
Feel the sensation and surrender to the River of Life
that flows through and renews your being.
Know that this river that flows through your landscape
nourishes you and carries within it all that you need.
When you are troubled, confused and seek peace or guidance,
Enter into the River of Life and you will be renewed.”
And as I open myself and give myself to the rhythm of the river that flows through me, I feel all my worries, stress and negativity washing away and so renewed, I return to myself and ask again…
What is it to be a woman today?
Connected with the earth and at one with the waters of my being, I sense a great rush of energy, of air and light, entering my torso, creating space, opening and igniting my heart.
Witness to this miracle, I am deeply silenced.
I bow my head in awe to what I sense is the Presence of my Higher Self.
In the sanctity of the moment, right here and right now,
I feel a deep connection,
of being held, embraced, honoured…
and then a transmission of love,
of compassion, of joy so rare, so genuine,
so real, I feel both empty and full.
And I feel in the depth of my heart centre
some seismic shifts, openings and reconfigurations
as I release what’s no longer needed
and allow a recalibration, an opening
to what wants to emerge and I feel in myself
a rippling energy – an aurora borealis of sorts
whispering in my heart…
“Be at peace with yourself and the world.
Love your Self.
Love me and be the joy you are.
Focus on what gives you joy and create the life you want!
Know yourself and live on-purpose…
This is your mission!”
Breathing or being breathed,
I simply am, allowing myself to simply
be one with the ebb and flow of my being.
And then, when the time is right, I return to myself and ask again…
What is it to be a woman today?
Feeling transformed, raw and open, a wholly new vista of possibilities emerge and present themselves before me…a parade, procession of potential futures….of roles to play and experiences to share.
I feel compelled,
gripped by what I see before me
and then, as if a mirage,
the images evaporate and disappear
and I feel a northern lights-like energy rippling through my body
and the imprint of a message from my Higher Self, as if burned into my flesh…
“Fill the void.
Imagine what you want – let yourself dream!
Design, create and play.
The future is yours to create!”
I knew in a flash that the key for me was in finding my voice…in giving voice to my thoughts, my feelings, my truth to what I know and what I feel…and through this process free my Self, share love and compassion, inspire hope, kindness, joy and encourage others to give voice to their truth wherever they may be in the world.
And I realized that, when, in full awareness,
the energies of earth, water, fire and air
come together and align in me,
I am ONE with all that is.
And so, I ground, centre and empty myself, clarify my intention, focus my attention and get out of my own way, letting the universal forces collaborate with me as I give voice to what it is to be a woman, a particular woman, the woman that is me.
Julia von Flotow
© March, 2011
www.kaizenleadershipinstitute.com
About Julia von Flotow
Wow! You must have had quite a day. I understand much of the story as invitations or prayers (especially the "Open to the Flow" one) that beacon and permit the Higgs boson (stuff that supports the universe) to become conscious via your mind. You are the witness to this occurrence. This was not the first time that you caused this phenomenon. I think the first time is when you heard in your thoughts:" I AM." Think about it. Didn't you already know that you are? Is it really you that is One with all there is? You don't look that big to me.
It's fascinating to read this stuff from a feminine perspective. Someday a woman is going to get in real deep and then come out and say with all honesty "God has a womans Voice"